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Writer's Block: 5//7//5

Jul. 15th, 2009 | 11:25 pm

Sum up your day in the form of a haiku.


Parramatta sucks
Rouse Hill Town Centre sucks too
Queensland: fucking screwed

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For you

Jul. 13th, 2009 | 11:22 am

HAPPY BIRTHDAY didz!!!!!!!!

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(no subject)

May. 15th, 2009 | 01:51 am

So in 12 hours I'll be boarding a plane to Rhode Island. See you all on the other side.

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Writer's Block: There Once Was a Girl from Nantucket

May. 13th, 2009 | 02:27 pm

It's Limerick Day! Share a favorite or compose your own humorous five-line poem with an AABBA rhyme structure.


I hope you enjoy my livejournal
May it reign in glory eternal
But I write most I find
When drunk out of my mind
And in dire need of a urinal

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I've decided

May. 7th, 2009 | 02:21 pm

If I could have been in any band of all time, it'd be Madness. Go watch any one of their music videos. Making things like that had to have been fun. I could do the walk. I'd play whatever instrument. All other bands look like drudgery compared to them.

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Writer's Block: Swine Times

May. 1st, 2009 | 09:41 am

Are you worried about catching the swine flu? Do you have a plan for avoiding contagion or dealing with quarantine?


I'm worried about the worldwide tissue shortage from the runny nose and sneezing pandemic.

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Writer's Block: The Green Generation

Apr. 22nd, 2009 | 09:28 pm

Will you be doing anything special to celebrate Earth Day today?


Well since it was today, I'll have to celebrate it tomorrow. I think I'll run all the taps, dump coolant down the drainpipe, not put out my recycling, and visiting a laundromat to dry every one of my articles of clothing in separate dryers. Any other suggestions?

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Writer's Block: Pet Peeve

Apr. 22nd, 2009 | 12:07 am

What is the most annoying sound in the entire world?




Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...Collapse )

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Writer's Block: Looking Back

Apr. 15th, 2009 | 09:10 am

LiveJournal is turning 10 and we're feeling nostalgic. What was your first LJ post about?


It was on another, now deleted journal about my day at work, killing bees and shit. Fun times.

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Lamenting Ford Tough

Apr. 2nd, 2009 | 03:10 pm

I once said that the problem with American trucks is not that they use iron, steel and gas in ludicrous amounts, but that these amounts aren't enough. Driving a truck should be like steering a rolling economic boon down the streets. Parents letting out children to school should fear your rumble from miles away. Building should be evacuated if you roll through their parking lots.

Thanks to idiots on Wall St., you're not going to see anymore Fords being Built Tough. They're going to be 'built sensible'. Built bullshit, I say. The problem is that suburban braindead people have tried to turn the pickup truck into a family car. It is not for families. It is for men. Men who work, men who eat meat, men who farm, and men who just don't care. It should be used to haul earth, not haul children (unless it's a lot of them, for manual labor purposes).

So what Ford and GM need to do is reclaim the title of "truck". One seat in the cab, a bench. Fit as many people as you dare on it. Ideally made for a man and a dog. The rest of the length of the truck is devoted to engine (big as possible) and bed (big as possible). Use as many wheels as necessary. Parking spot fitting is optional. Home Depot has big enough lots! Where you're going, there's no white lines indicating where to stop. Mileage? Eat shit! POWER.

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